I fall in love with different types of books.  There are those books that strike me as intriguing and I pick them up at the bookstore and after several more hours of perusing, I’ll purchase and put my new found treasure on a random book shelf, assuring myself that I have carefully marked a spot and that I will return in a few hours, at a later time, even next week, to claim my new mini-vacation within the pages of a book.  (I must mention that it rarely happens that I return to the same spot and it is also unfortunate but true that I’ve been known to misplace lots and lots of books only to find them months later a few feet from where I’d been looking initially and thought I’d placed them in the first place).  In the interests of truthfulness, you should also know that because of this and other book buying, reading and writing habits, I’m known to be eccentric, both within and outside of my circle of friends.  I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m not like other people. I get different.  Not everyone has the same measure of understanding and that’s unfortunate.

Back to the subject of this review, I AM NOT MYSELF THESE DAYS by Josh Kilmer-Purcell.  Kilmer-Purcell’s book was one of the ones I purchased, put aside, then couldn’t find and finally devoured – because it was an absolutely great memoir from page one.  And it is about being different, making mistakes, falling down, changing, loving and all the good things that books of this genre typify.

Kilmer-Purcell tells the story of his life as an alcoholic, cross-dressing man who falls for a male prostitute in New York City, of all places.  As you can imagine, it’s not a book for the faint of heart or the timid.  There are some people that would pronounce this book unreadable because of the subject matter.  I read it exactly for the subject matter, thinking to broaden my horizons and found that I have (I hope) made myself more open to understanding how our differences in terms of sexual preferences and gender bending, informs and impact our society.  Fringe living ain’t so fringe any more. Have you noticed how many memoirs are being written about alcoholism, drug use and childhood sexual abuse? Have you seen a six-foot drag queen on the “A” train trying to get home after a night of partying?

I think Kilmer- Purcell has it right.  Tell the story of how crack can further destroy the most dysfunctional of relationships, tell it with verve and fervor and with jocularity.  New writing talent is discovered all the time. Mr. Kilmer-Purcell has earned his way onto my shelves.  Pick up a copy of I AM NOT MYSELF THESE DAYS.  I don’t believe you’ll be disappointed.

reviewed by ...  Bonnie Glover